Chapter Ten

Chapter 10




Two weeks later




I feel my eyelids drooping but refuse to indulge in a nap. I need to watch over Josephine. Her fever broke a couple of days ago, so she is on the mend. Anna sits next to me sleeping. Since Anna has already had the dreaded disease she can be in here. Since the day Anna got sick, Ma, Pa, Arthur, and Josephine have had it. Josephine has had longer. I have been in constant conversation with God to protect Josephine. Everyone else is better, weary but better. I have been the one to take care of everyone. Surprisingly I have yet to get it. I thank God for that everyday. I have been praising God that everyone is on the mend and did not die. I have not heard of any servants besides Lilly Anna’s ladies’ maid. I have not been out of the sick room since Anna came down with it.
I feel my eyelids droop again and I jolt awake. I need to be here for Josephine. I hear Anna’s even breathing next to me. I look at her. Her poor innocent face scarred from the pustules. They will fade but for now her face is scarred. I look at Josephine. Her face is ashen and her breathing is labored. I smell the smoke of the Jhau leaves. I wrinkle my nose. Definitely not the best smell but if it helps my family I’ll endure it.
I hear someone coming up the stairs. I look up to see Mr. John in the doorway. I smile at him. He smiles that easy smile that makes people want to forget their worries and smile with him. He’s like a second Pa to me. I stand up and walk to him. He reaches out his arms and envelops me in a warm fatherly hug. He smells of horse and outdoors. I sigh. I can forget my sorrows in his arms. He releases me and smiles at me. I return the smile. “Lizzy, how’s Jose?” I smile at his mention of our kid nicknames. I look to Josephine.
“Her fever broke a couple of days ago so she’s on the mend.” I look back at him. He nods.
“Lizzy, when was the last time you were out of the house?” It was a simple question but I feel he’ll be disappointed in my answer. I look down.
“I have not been out of the house since Anna came down sick.” I reply. I look up and see sympathy in his eyes.
“Lizzy, why don’t we get Mary-Lou to look over her and you go out and get some fresh air.”
“Oh! Mr. John I can’t leave her!” I look at Josephine and back at him. “Mr. John I appreciate the concern but I need to be here for Jose.”
“It’s okay to take a break for an hour or more.” I shake my head. “Lizzy, take a break, I ain’t gonna hear anymore or your arguin’. I’m a gettin’ Mary-Lou and she’ll sit with Jose.” He leaves the room without another word. I slump back to my chair. I sit down and humph out a groan. Leave it to Mr. John to do this. I lean my head back on the chair head rest. I feel drowsy. Maybe I should just rest my eyes till Mr. John gets back with Gamma….





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I wake from sunlight shining in the window. I open my eyes and see I’m in my room. I bolt up. How did I get my in my room? I look around. I swing my feet over the edge of the bed. I sit up and grab my dressing gown. When did I get in my nightgown? I feel my hair is in a braid down my back. What happened? I walk to the door and ring for Brigit. I hear foot steps coming up the servant staircase. I soon see Brigit entering. She curtsies. “Brigit, what happened?” I ask.
“Miss, I’m not sure I know what you mean.”
“How’d I get in my nightgown with my hair braided in my room?”
“Oh, Miss, Mr. Duncan found you sleeping in the chair in the sick room. He ordered George to carry to your room and ordered us to let you sleep.” Brigit explained.
“How long have I slept?” I inquire.
“For two days Miss.” Brigit answers.
“Two days!” I start to pace. Two days! I can’t believe I let Josephine down. I needed to stay by her side and I fell asleep. How’s Josephine? Is she worse? Better? I don’t know! I look to Brigit and she looks nervous. I stop pacing. “Brigit how’s Josephine? Is she worse? Better?”
“She’s right as rain now. She’s still weak Miss, but she’s much better.” I let out a breath I did not know I was holding. I walk to my bureau and pull out a simple gray skirt and a white blouse.
“Brigit help me dress.”
“Yes Miss.” She quickly ties my corset and helps me dress. She puts my hair into a chignon. I smile my thanks and walk out the door into the hall.
I walk to the sick room. I see Josephine sitting up in the bed laughing at something someone said. I smile. She looks much better. Her coloring is back to normal and the pustules scars are fading. I walk in further in the room and see Mr. John, Will, Arthur, Ma, Pa, and Anna. Anna is sitting on the bed with Josephine. Everyone looks up at me. I smile in greeting. I look to Will and feel his smile in the deepest part of me. I feel my knees buckle and hurry to look away. I walk to stand next to the bed. Josephine looks at me and smiles. She reaches to grab my hand. I place her hand in mine. I squeeze her hand. “How’re you feeling Jose?” I inquire.
“Feeling much better today Lizzy. Thank you so much Lizzy for all you did for me when I was sick. I can never thank you enough. It’s a wonder you never came down with it as well.” Josephine answers.
“All I can say is God blessed us with everyone better now.” I look to everyone in the room and thank God again for saving my dear family from small pox. Ma smiles at me. She nods like she knew what I was thinking. I look to Pa who winks at me. I love my family dearly and could never face it if anyone of them were taken away from me.





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I sit under the Oak tree with the new book I picked up at mercantile. This is my favorite place to read. I’m surrounded by nature with the birds chirping above my head. It’s been a month since the smallpox epidemic came to Whispering Hills. It’s now early March and the birds are now coming back to Tennessee. Everyone who left Whispering Hills because of smallpox came back a week ago. Today I made it my mission to go over to the Cooks’ house to make amends with Charity. I may be laughed at but at least I will feel better knowing I tried.
I place my book down and stand up. I planned to walk over to the Cooks’. It was a good two miles not much of a walk. I pick up my book hike my skirts and run to the house. Ma would scold me if she knew I raised my skirts above my ankles.
But you can’t run in these blasted skirts. There’s also the corset jabbing into my sides. Oh how I wish I was younger so I did not have to wear the wretched thing. I can only wish the blasted thing is out of style soon. Why does it matter if I have a tiny waist or not? I’d rather have a plump waist then have to take shallow breaths.
I reach the door and halt to catch my breath. Stupid corset. I feel my hair falling out of its pins. I grab my hair and keep it up on my head. I drop my book to fix my hair. I shake the rest of the pins out of it and bend to pick them. My view is hidden from the curtain of my hair. I see a hand near my feet pick up some pins and I straighten up.
I look into the face of Will grinning. I feel a flutter in my stomach and silently scold it for acting like a ninny. He hands me the pins and reach toward my face. My breath catches. He stops at me hair and touches it. I feel a blush crawling from my neckline up to my hairline. He grabs some and pulls. He releases it and hands me a pin. “It was stuck in your hair.” He explains. My heart races. Why does he have this effect on me? His eyes are still hooked on my hair. I look away. I need to stop having this reaction every time I’m near him. He seems to come to his senses and smiles sheepishly. I see his cheeks have turned a shade redder. I inwardly smile. He’s blushing! I hear someone clear they’re throat. I look to the door and see Mr. John smiling quite proudly. I look away and quickly re-pin my hair. I smile to Will and run into the house, but not before I hear Mr. John chortle and say “Will my boy, blushing is not too handsome on ya.” I blush right along with him.





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I walk to the front door of the Cooks’ house. I take a deep breath and knock. Their butler Samuel answers the door. He nods to me and opens the door wider to let me in. “I’ll announce you bein’ here Miss Winthorpe.” I thank him and watch him enter the parlor. A minute later he reappears and nods letting me know I can enter. I follow him in. I see Mrs. Cook and Charity needle pointing. I smile at each of them. I see Charity humph and continue to needle point. Mrs. Cook smiles warmly and pats the chair next to her. I oblige and sit down. “So Elizabeth Dear how did your family fair with the epidemic? I heard y’all stayed during it.” I nod to acknowledge her to be right.
“We faired good compared to other folks. Anna, Ma, Pa, Arthur, and Josephine came down with it along with one of the servants. Thank God no one was taken from us.” I smile warmly. I feel the tension with Charity in the room but choose to ignore it and continue to tete-tete with Mrs. Cook.
“My! What a tragedy for all of them to go through. If you don’t mind me asking why did y’all stay?”
“Well, Pa said we were under no threat of it. But he thought no one had gone to town while the germs were floating around. Unfortunately Lilly, Anna’s ladies’ maid, had gone to town a couple of days before. She must have carried the germs home.” Mrs. Cook nods. I see Charity look up. I take a deep breath and take the plunge. I look back at her with a smile. She does something like a sneer and looks down. I clear my throat and feel it tighten. Breathe, just breathe. I can do this. “Charity would you like to take a walk it’s such a beautiful day.” I let out the breath I was holding. I did it. She looks at me with astonishment. Her mouth hangs open as she gapes at me.
“Elizabeth Dear, that’s sounds lovely! Charity it’s such a glorious day go on.” Charity gapes at her mother. “Charity close your mouth.” She turns to me. “Elizabeth, Charity would love to.” She smiles and continues to needle point. I stand and look at Charity. She glares at her mother and stands and reluctantly follows me out. “Samuel Elizabeth and I are going for a walk. Don’t hold tea for us.”
She grabs her shawl and walks out. I follow suit. Silence so thick between us you could cut with an axe. Charity walks with a scowl that would make Howard the butcher, who never smiles ever, proud. I pray God gives me the right words to say to her. I look to her. “Charity, why do you dislike me?” I ask. She looks stunned at me. “Ever since we were kids, I have felt you had it out to get me. I just wanted to know why that is.” I see her struggle and almost thought she would not answer me. Then she slowly releases a breath and stops walking. She turns to me and smiles. The first that I know of that she has ever sent me.
“Remember when we met?” I nod. “Well Mama and Papa, came to your house to meet our neighbors. When I exited the carriage I saw Will and you running in the yard. It looked like y’all were playing some sort of tag. I wanted so badly to play with y’all. I knew Mama would never let me. You seemed so carefree. Like nothing would get in your way of playing with your friend.
“When we got older, I noticed how strapping Will had gotten. For you know the summer we turned four and ten my family left for our home in New York. Mama can never handle the heat here in Tennessee. I saw him after he turned five and ten. I started to think how lovely it would be if he would notice me. Unfortunately he only had eyes for you.
“Even when you left for finishing school he sulked around, waiting impatiently for your next letter to him. I knew then that I would never be in his mind. In summary, I’m jealous of you. I know. Me. Someone who can have anything she ever wanted was jealous of you. You were always carefree and always happy. Inside I was resenting you for seeming so happy. I wanted that for myself. Even when I insulted you, you never were too harsh on me. I saw you always happy and laughing. You’re gorgeous Elizabeth. Inside and out. I wish I can say the same thing for me.” She hung her head in shame. I placed my hand on her shoulder. She looks at me. I smile telling her I am not mad.
“Charity, all these years I never knew. You shouldn’t feel ashamed. Jealously is a very common emotion for us humans. That’s what makes us humans. God designed us to feel all sorts of emotions. In truth I’ve felt it constantly. With you. I was always jealous of you. You always have perfect hair, perfect complexion, and perfect dresses that always made you look marvelous. While me, I have this straight black hair. Tanned skin with these freckles all over. I can never find any dress that looks perfect on me.”
I suddenly laugh. This was all so funny. Charity looks at me like I’ve gone mad. I laugh all the harder. She suddenly joins in. Soon we are laughing so hard it’s hard to catch our breaths. I look at her and realize the tension I’ve felt with her all these years faded away. We reach for each other and embrace. I know I’ve found a friend in Charity after years of jealousy. It was not till we had gone back to the house and I made my way home when I realized had Charity said all these years Will only had eyes for me.

God bless!